Conference

I LOVED CONFERENCE!!!! I know this is a little late, but at least I'm posting. I really needed conference this time. It was so good and most of the talks really hit home for me. I got to spend it with my parents in Roosevelt with my mom doing all the cooking and mostly taking care of Brielle. It was so nice and relaxing. I especially loved the Women's Relief Society broadcast. I have been having some major self esteem issues lately. For those of you who used to know me back in high school or just earlier in my life, this would be the last thing you would ever think I would struggle with. I grew up with parents who constantly told me how wonderful and loved I was and I knew who I was, a daughter of God, and I had no problems with self esteem. I think that Satan has just been working really, really hard on me lately and he was winning for a few weeks. I felt that if I looked differently, or acted differently or changed my personality a little bit, people would like me more. I am not sure where this all came from. I didn't like the way I looked, I was tired and I was struggling with being nice to my husband and I just felt sad a lot of the time. I kept praying for guidance and I realized that I just needed to lose myself in service. I missed my visiting teaching the last couple of months and whenever I do that I feel awful! I have such a strong conviction of VT and when I do not do it, I have a hard month. So what was President Uchtdorf's talk on? Service and that you will be happy when you serve (I'm not sure if that was all his talk was on, but that is what I got out of it inbetween sobs). It was so true and as soon as I got out of my self pity state, and got my visiting teaching done and started realizing how much I have and how blessed I am, I'm doing so much better. I again know and can feel how much God loves me and loves each of his children. We are so blessed to have the gospel in our lives and to be able to know why we are here and what our purpose is, To help and serve others! I'm so grateful for a wonderful family and especially a sweet and patient husband who is always so sweet to me and is great with Brielle. I'm so blessed and I can't wait to continue to serve as much as I can in whatever I am called to do. That is what will keep us happy and out of self pity. Now I know and hopefully I will not lose that perspective again soon. I love my life and am grateful for a Heavenly Father who is always there for us.